Messy & tangled
“The ultimate test for the ability to control the quality of experience is what a person does in solitude, with no external demands to give structure to attention. It is relatively easy to become involved with a job, to enjoy the company of friends, to be entertained in a theater or at a concert. But what happens when we are left to our own devices? Alone, when the dark night of the soul descends, are we forced into frantic attempts to distract the mind from its coming? Or are we able to take on activities that are not only enjoyable, but make the self grow?”
– Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, from “Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience”
Oh, that quote. Thought-provoking but too much right now. Facepalm.
Among other things I’ve read/heard recently, trying to unpack this quote was a total wake-up call. Enough of this philosophical crap already!
I’ve realized that there is definitely a limit to how much new information I can take in without feeling overwhelmed. I can’t quantify it, but I can feel it. It’s a messy & tangled feeling.
It’s the moment you go from “filling your cup” to accidentally pouring too much into the cup… And now it’s dripping over the edges and you’ve made a mess. You can’t focus on all the goodness in the cup, because you’re distracted by what you have to clean up first.
Please tell me you know what I’m talking about!!
Two main questions I have for this post:
- How do you protect passion from becoming obsession?
- How do you get better at being tough and tender at the same time?
. .
About a week ago, I heard Gabby Reese say during a Truth Barrel podcast, “Don’t get seduced by the content.” So simple, but so powerful – right?
Her point was that sometimes you have to let stuff wash over you.
It’s not minimizing feelings, it’s acknowledging that they are going to be up & down, left & right, here and there. The key to navigating through them? “Not to muscle it, and not to disconnect from it.”
The last thing I’ll share from this particular podcast, was how Gabby described the manner in which she likes to talk through issues or ideas:
“It’s not circling the bull of my feelings round and round and round. It has a linear, directive, directional moment which really resonates with me. I don’t wanna sit in it round and round. I wanna get a sense of it and play and move into it.”
I love this because it’s practical.
Taken a step further, here’s my takeaway:
THE GOOD STUFF IS GONNA HAPPEN. TRUST IT, AND LET GO. (Do I need to say “amor fati” again?? Okay I’ll stop, I promise…) Maybe it’s good to set boundaries on when & how often you really allow yourself to process. More time and focus DOING than THINKING – it’s more fun that way anyway.
Some goodness to share:
- “The Inner Ring” by C.S. Lewis – Can be found online: http://www.lewissociety.org/innerring.php
- Mind Pump: Raw Fitness Truth Podcast, episode 630: Amelia Boone
- “Wild Geese” by Mary Oliver:
You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting –
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.